Today I did not feel well. I could not drag myself out of bed this morning, and so I was rushing to get out the door and didn't get a chance to eat breakfast. I started my day off coughing and sneezing (that part didn't go away...still got it) and more tired than I feel like I have ever been.
So of course it makes sense that today was the day I was observed. And today was the day that the children thought it would be "soooo funny" to give me all the wrong answers to my questions during Opening...so I was a little panicked.
But it went fine. I coughed my way through it and I was surprised at how not terrible it went. I know that I have done better and that I will do better, but today was good enough for today.
I was very touched when my supervisor told me that I should be a teacher because I've just "got it." I wonder if maybe I think this isn't for me because I am just SO HARD on myself that I think I do a terrible job on something that I'm actually just fine at. I'm so lost these days...
Here is what I am thinking:
I need to be a teacher. At least for a little while. If I want any credibility as a teacher educator, I need to have experience. I'm thinking I could do this while I get my PhD or any other accreditation that I need to do...whatever it is I'm going to do. I don't know how long it will be for...but I will be doing it.
I want to do assessment. I don't yet know in what context...but I will be doing it.
I want to be a teacher educator. I don't know when I will make this happen, or where I will be...but I will be doing it.
Those are my thoughts for the day. We will see what tomorrow brings (it could change everything).
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